what i have written above occurs or happens or concludes in a short time.but it brings us a lot of happiness .when we ask someone, how r u, the person feels happy or very happy, which each of us would have experienced. it tells us that someone is concerned about us if not totally atleast partially.it is a very good feeling and lets us carry on in our life which is filled with lots of things which in most cases cause us trouble and loss of our happiness.
happiness is described as a state of mind .it is most often used by the people who see us.it is used to describe our state of mind.happiness,as i opine is, absolute, in which u r happy for the reasons or things happening to you,or, relative ,for things happening to one of our close fellows.there r many reasons for happiness such as a new vehicle,a birthday,a result , nice climate , a helping hand and other vagaries or essentialities for our living and the instance i mentioned above,is also one of the reasons.
when we talk about happiness we say i am happy ; i am more happy ; i am the happiest ,etc.what makes us grade the happiness we enjoy ? ofcourse, the way we do that work,the previous expectation we had regarding that particular thing,the circumstances,and above all the mighty and the supreme power that governs all men and is reponsible for that state of mind---GOD.
how happy are we ? apart from ourownselves being happy,are we contributing to someones happiness ?
partly deviating here,the most common word these days used by mostly young people is depression. the causes of depression vary and are many.depressed is the word we use and assume as the opposite of happy.the most common cause for depression these days is more of a psychological type rather than physical.when i enquired in a medical school ,a few years back , when there were about six cases of suicidalhanging in one year, most of the students opined as the common cause--comparing with fellow students.and other reason as teasing by fellow students.
the reasons i mentioned above are not limited to only the medical school.it occurs in any place of work.any place ; i mean it.
in most instances when we meet some one who is either related to us or not , we try to create a positive impression of us.we talk of only the positives , or , we try to tell them what we dont have . why are we trying to do like that ? why are we masking ourself? why are we not able to accept our own ability or our potential ? why are we trying to show what we are not ?
one of the reason is survival of the fittest. is it really true ?? when someone is commenting on our inability we feel depressed.then we become angry beause we are hurt.here there r two paths....either we think of IT ONLY and increase our anger or we think of an alternative.the other side of the coin is the other person who has hurt us keeps on doing it. why?? some say if we do like that the other fellow changes atleast because of that.the question lies here.are all people changing because of that??? if not why?? if someone changes it is for his good,then his family,and then the society.he will add as another part for the positive thinking.but if the answer is no why is it not happening ? why are young people commiting suicide these days in contrast to old people earlier and why is the number going up.?? in most of the instances the fellow or fellows who tease dont know the correct way to motivate someone in trouble;i.e, negatively pushing for a positive attitude, and most of them , i can say from my experience, 99% , dont know the real cause and the correct way to address it !!! .the basis of all these things is insecurity....i will tell you one situation.ramu was a bright student in his class.he was intelligent apart from the hardworking nature.onthe other hand sham was not so intelligent neither was he much hardworking.see, here i am comparing two extremes.parents of sham were in a higher position than that of ramu's.so sham parents were not able to digest that.they started haressing sham to work hard.they began to compare him to ramu.what the end result was sham failed in the final exams.the parents then increased the torture of the child.this becomes a vicious circle.and this is the basis for sham's insecurity,which brings a lot trouble in later life.he grows up and because of the insecurity in him he loses the confidence in him,which is the first step for ones degrading.it is compounded when someone teases him.ironically, it is also the same insecurity that is present in the person who teases. how many of us are like that ? ultimately, because of the lack of confidence in him he does not rely on anyone for anything. gradually this becomes a major problem as he feels lonely. most people who say they are depressed, before taking any hurried decision, are isolated from the rest of the world.
recently i came across an article .it is about the suicidalhanging of a fellow who has failed in love.the surprising thing was the girl left him because that fellow's senior called the girl and said that he is not fit for any thing!!! who are we to judge others ?? did we create that fellow.do we have the capacity to really completely understand anyone ??
are we someone like that ?? lets ask this question to our ownself.are we contributing to someones degrading ?? are we responsible in any way to someones loss of happiness ?? why is such a negative attitude growing in us?? are we not educated?? is this all what education learns us ??
some label it as ego. everyone of us have had experienced ego problem at sometime in our life. ego helps us only in part , in our daily life. in the above example of ramu and sham, if the parents of sham would have spared sometime for the kid and learn him what is going on and help him to excel,it brings about ,what is called as a type of exposure which helps the child to think in a positive way.then the child picks up gradually and if anytime in his life he does not succeed in any matter then the point of ego comes out , which pushes him to work even harder.here because sham developed a positive attitude or thinking the ego is being confined.when it is not confined to a certain limit,it brings us a lot of problems.recently, the owner of a company hired a manager for the upbringing of the company.when after a few days he learnt that the manager was more competitive than him and not well read than him he dismissed the manager.when someone hears of it,the first thing that comes to our mind is ego.
ego is not being confined by us only to the workplace.it is appearing even in our homes.is it not true ? is it not the reason for the increasing number of divorce rates ? imagine one situation here.the husband and wife because of their ego,when something goes wrong,do not talk to each other .instead they convey through their children.imagine how much the children are stressed ? i asked one kid whose mom and dad frequently shout at each other; what do u feel ? the answer was,they are that way!!what i want you to think is,how much that kid was stressed inorder to answer in that way?? sometimes that coldwar goes for weeks or even months.are the parents not worried about the kids ?
the pity is,even among friends this is a common problem.
why are we not able to confine that ego? why are we nurturing an important factor of negative behavior which sometimes devastates our lives ?
one of the most beautiful descriptions of life is, it is like steam that is visible only for a very short time. we dont know what happens in the next moment of our life. why are we so negatively concerned about that very short time ?? why are we being rude in our behavior ?
lets think about that.let's be patient enough atleast to hear to someone .let's be atleast one of the reasons for someones happiness.
ofcourse patience pays and is an important factor for our wellbeing. an old saying ..happiness increases as we share it...so lets think of that and lets confine our ego and along with increasing our hapiness , contribute to someones well being.lets be a part of the army fighting against depression and lets drive it away......
SPOOKYWOOD34
